Thursday, December 09, 2010

Why exercise won't make you thin

Well, Duh.

I have always found the key to weight loss to be:  Stomach Flu.  Stomach Flu and Food Poisoning.  Get a good bowel bender once a year and bob’s your uncle:  svelte and sexy.  Stay healthy all year and look out blubber.  How do you think all those Ethiopians do it?  They’ve got one of the four Horsemen of the Apocalypse on their side.  Pestilence:  far better that Richard Simmons (and a lot less irritating).  Come to think of it, a Richy Simmons exercise tape is a lot like an explosive bowel movement…..



If  you're interested, I can send you my recipe for Salmonella Nachos.  For really major weight loss you can try my Cholera Chorizo….

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