The Man Purse

I went to Schnucks today. The van window wouldn't close and Diane's purse was there. Walked into the grocery store with it. I held it very mannishly, hiding it in the cart. Fortunately it was a very sober blue model. The check out lady eyed me suspiciously. "It's not mine", I said, staring straight into her accusing eyes, "never said it was" she stared right back. Stand-off.  So I picked up my groceries, shouldered my purse and flounced out.